Catch Them Being Good
by
Dr. Jayne A. Major
Breakthrough Parenting, Inc.

             

“There are always flowers for those who want to see them.”
- Henri Matisse

Everyone wears a sign on their forehead that says, “Make me feel important”. Catch Them Being Good is one of most effective and easy to use methods that parents can use with children. Learn this one method, and suddenly you will see a fabulous shift in how you get along with children. Indeed, in all of your relationships!
When parents catch their children being good, the children feel appreciated instead of criticized. The unconditional love that already exists between parent and child is expressed. Children will reciprocate by catching their parents being good, and suddenly the whole family dynamic has changed. Can it be that simple?  Yes. 
How does it work?  Think about those things that you do competently, the skills you have that you are proud of. How did you learn to do these things? You weren't born knowing how. You learned how.  Someone, probably several people, told you: “Correct. Good job. You figured that out. You did it!” Or, maybe a teacher gave you a good grade, which confirmed that you understood and had some degree of mastery.
Think of this example.  Little Joey has the task of learning how to tie his shoes.  What would happen if every time he tried, and got it wrong, his parents jumped up and down with excitement and said, “Hooray, terrific!  I'm proud of you!”, and handed him a lollipop?  How long would it take before Joey learned how to tie his shoes?  I think that you get the point.  The only reason that you know how to do anything is that someone verified that you got it right.  Without this kind of a reality check, we don’t know when we are successful.
Catch Them Being Good captures the very essence of how people learn.  If you believe that there are no mistakes, only lessons, you can guide your children in the direction that you want them to go with this under-used skill.  This technique is the most important steering mechanism that we have on the road to encouraging a developing rational mind.  It focuses on what is right, reasonable and responsible.  It amazing!  It works!
Excerpted from the book  Breakthrough Parenting: A Revolutionary New Way to Raise Children by Dr. A. Jayne Major. More information about the book.
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